WHEN YOU DISAPPEAR ON A NARCISSIST

By: Khalif Barkhadle,
Digital Journalist

Published On: 23rd December 2024

When you disappear on a narcissist, it can trigger intense reactions because they thrive on control and attention. Without your presence, they may attempt to regain power through manipulation, guilt-tripping, or smear campaigns. The sudden loss of their “supply” forces them to confront the reality that they’re not in control, which can lead to anger or even a frantic attempt to get you back. However, staying no-contact is often the most empowering choice, allowing you to break free from their toxic influence and start healing.

✓Loss of Control

The first thing you need to understand is the narcissist’s intense need for control. They thrive on knowing what will happen next and ensuring they control the outcome. When they lose that control, it shakes them deeply. This isn’t about playing games on your part; it’s simply that you’ve had enough. But for the narcissist, losing control triggers a profound reaction.

Control is everything to a narcissist—it’s rooted in fears of rejection and abandonment. When they don’t have control, these core wounds surface. They fear rejection and abandonment because it’s tied to unresolved childhood experiences. They may never openly admit it or even be consciously aware, but losing control pushes them into a place of deep-seated fear.

✓Fear and Rejection